Why did the rapper bring a vacuum to the concert?
So the haters could SUCK on him!
Why did the rapper bring a clock to the stage?
To keep track of his rhyme time.
Why did the rapper always carry a pencil?
In case he had to draw a crowd.
Why was the rapper bad at basketball?
He could only dribble rhymes.
Stephen Hawking is a real stand up guy, out-standing performance.
Friend: If you don't like my bad jokes, I will tell some stand up comedy.
Me: But you are not standing:)
What is it that a 🤔 😳 👀 😕 physicality handicapped ♿ male prostitute can do on his own very well without getting any help from his male friends that are gay like himself?
Perform fellatio on a 👨 👨 👬 gay man.
Is your dad a magician?
Because he magically disappeared.
My little brother is scared of ghosts so I won't let him watch Bayern today.
Okay, I may be strict, but I won't let Tapindowski give my son a heart attack. His shocking ghosting performance today is a danger to my family and I'll ask UEFA to investigate the matter.
My fat friend went to the doctor because he wanted to know his blood type. After performing some tests, the doctor said, "Well, the test results have shown that your blood type is ragu."
She really sucks, and the guy who is with her sucks too.
Why did the rapper oil up his notepad?
In case he needed to DROP some FREESTYLE NOTES!
Why did the rapper bring a map to the concert?
To find his way to the top of the CHARTS.
Louis' IQ is like his running; always two points below average.
What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination?
HAAAAAANNNNDDDDEEEEEEYYYYEEEEEE!
My wife and I have been married over 30 years, but don’t get me wrong, we still perform tricks in the bedroom.
I sit up and beg, she rolls over and plays dead.
Why did the rapper become an electrician?
Because he wanted to SHOCK the audience with his RHYMES.
What do you call a white guy who can actually dance? Jewish.
You know chords, right? Well, you know what I love to do? To play with A-minor. You know, feel your fingers on A-minor. Gives you a sense of power, to just F A-minor.
But that's not my favorite thing to fiddle with. That would be the D of minors. It's just solid, you know. If you're clever you can have the D of minors into the C of minors. Or, though a bit tricky, the D of minors into the B of minors.
And at this point you've gotten the point and if I want to continue it would be a bit of a stretch.
Yo mama's so ugly, and her voice is so loud that The X Factor doesn't want or need her to show up to the performances when she sings.
