Performance jokes
What's a rapper's favorite type of CANDY?
Mic Drops.
Why was the rapper always so confident?
Because he had a lot of rhyme and reason!
Why did the rapper become a magician?
Because he wanted to drop some ILL-USIONS.
What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
A LYRICAL WIZARD
Why did the rapper go to school?
To drop some KNOWLEDGEABLE RHYMES!
Why did the rapper go to school?
To master the art of RAP-LETICS!
Why did the rapper bring a comb to the concert?
Because he wanted to STYLE his FLOW.
Why did the alien go to the rap battle?
Because he had some UNEARTHLY rhymes!
Why did the rapper bring a map to the concert?
Because he didn't want to get LOST in the FLOW.
What did the beat say to the rapper?
"You're off rhythm, but I'll give you a hand!"
What's a rapper's favorite instrument?
The MIC-DROPHONE!
Why did the rapper take a shower before the concert?
To WASH AWAY the haters!
If someone made a comedy routine about Terri Schiavo, would that be considered roasting a vegetable?
Why didn’t the pecan go to the ballet?
It was afraid of the nutcracker.
Q: Why did the ballerina get kicked off the stage at the performance?
She was standing way too close to the dancers.
Do you know how I lost my music teacher job?
I tried to hit G by putting D.
Why do physically disabled gay men like performing blowjobs on well-endowed, abled-bodied gay men?
Because physically disabled gay men prefer eating pepperoni than eating sausage links for dinner 🍽
Why was the rapper always cold?
Because he kept spitting ice!
Why was the rapper afraid of ghosts?
Because they kept booing him off stage!
What do you call an Eskimo stripper?
A frosty-tute.