People jokes

Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"

Me: "Nun."

I hate it when I go to the shop and people are like, "Oh, hey what are you doing here?"

Me: "Oh, you know, just hunting elephants."

People in Africa have earth, fire, air, but never water.

Why do people never kick their own balls?

Because they might lose one!

Why do white people own so many pets?

'Cause they can't own people anymore.

When people say they get ho's: You don't get no ho's, the only ho's you get is in yo draws.

I C U P works on 88% of people.

I would call Slade dense, but that would be an insult to rocks.

Unfortunately, NASCAR has been canceled.

The woke people heard that it was a human traffic ring.

What do us emos all have in common?

Depression. Anxiety. The sole desire to just start saying you wanna kys right out of the blue a lot and saying "I CAN'T WAIT TO JUMP OF THAT BUILDING SOON!" and other people say, "Idgaf, do it, all of us would be happy."

What do you call people with ADHD?

A brainless speeder.

Orphans and Chinese people can’t play baseball. The orphans can’t find home, and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.

What does Leo have in common with a newspaper?

They both love to yap and babble, and they always get fondled by old people.

Why don't paralyzed people laugh?

They hate stand-up comedy.

You're so fat that people say you're the biggest bird!

Too many people.

Not enough VooDoo dolls.

I lost my job at a research facility. The people were too chill for me.

My acquaintance, William.

Solicitors are more likely to harass someone with a “no soliciting” sign on their front porch.

I walked up to 2 people kissing and stared.

After a little while, they asked me if I minded. I said no, I don’t mind.