People jokes
There was a guy called John.
A dad and son walk into a strip club. The people in the strip club said he was too young to be in here, so they had to leave. Ten years later, they went back there. They saw a small dancer. The father walked over there and said the woman looked too small to be in here. Her reply was... "I wasn't dancing ten years ago."
Bob: What is the percent of people who are depressed?
Me: If you're only counting me, 100%.
Popular guy in class: I am so funny.
Me: Your parents are funny as they made a joke and people are still laughing at it.
Why aren't blind people in Brazil?
Because they can only read Braille. 🇧🇷 🙄
What is the similarity between depressed people and hoodies?
The color black.
Yo mama so fat, everyday people kept asking: "Are you pregnant?"
The cycle of Pionel Pessi:
- Ghosting👻
- Diving🐬
- Complaining to teammates😡
- Complaining to refs🤬
- Missing sitters🤦♂️
- Gets a lucky open net tapin⚽️
- Proceed to get 🐐 shouts
- Repeat🔁
People with REAL ball knowledge know he’s just an overrated tapin merchant 😭
Yo momma is so ugly, she gets rejected by dead people.
This girl told me people call her ugly because she is disabled. I told her to stand up for herself.
People said that Kobe could fly so high, but that did not end well.
A project where people get lined up to be changed.
I’m like an escalator because I’m always letting people down.
I was having issues in my personal and professional life. I hated everyone. I was on the brink of a mental breakdown and depression. I decided to see a therapist about it. The therapist suggested that I should write letters to the people I hate and then burn them. I must admit I feel much better...
But now I don't know what to do with the letters.
I heard some twin brothers were going as buildings to the school costume contest, so I went as a plane. It didn't fly too well with people.
Some people could say that the sky was falling that day,
one second they saw the sun and the next they saw heaven.
Scratches on an icy road and kills 50 people on the bus, and when they get to Heaven, God feels so bad for them and grants them all one wish.
The first lady in the line was always worried about her looks, so she wished to be beautiful, and the guy behind her couldn’t think of what to wish about, so he also wished to be beautiful. This kept on going, but the guy at the end of the line started to laugh. When he got to God, God says, “What is your one wish, my son?” He said, “I wish you can make them all ugly again.”
There are people who are beautiful, and then there are people whom I won't rape.
Why did God create sex for marriage?
Because he wanted more people and less fun.
I hate it when disabled people get bullied...
... because they can't stand up for themselves.