Pedophile jokes
What’s the relationship between a pedophile and a light bulb? They're both meant for dark rooms.
What did the pedophile say to the kids?
"FUCK!"
A pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly. The man answers, "I don't wake up the kids."
What’s the worst thing about being a pedophile?
Fitting it in.
Mosely in a white van.
How do pedophiles follow the law?
They drive it slow in the school zone.
What's the best thing about being a pedophile? You can choose the fit profession where you find kids most.
Pedophile: You dropped your candy.
Girl: Thanks!
Pedophile stares as she slowly bends over to pick up her candy.
Pedophile: It looks a bit dirty, do you wanna come back to my house and get a new one?
Girl: How far is your house?
Pedophile: It's that white one right over there.
Girl: You mean that van next to a dumpster?
Pedophile: Yep, it's that one.
Girl:.... Sure! :P
Audience:.........Dumbass girl.
What is pedophiles' favorite prey: Vegetables?
What's a pedophile's favorite place to go in?
Kum and Go.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I know a pedophile,
And he says he knows you.
Remember that 18 year old girl I set you up with?
Why not?
Too old.
Kill yourself!
When a kid says, "I'm a pedophile," it means that he has a crush on one of his classmates.
When an adult says it, he is accused as a rapper.
Tyler
What do you call a pansexual pedophile? Jesus.
See you later, crocodile.
In a while, pedophile.
Why did the child cross the road?
To get to the church.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The Priest... Let's go to my office, because I'm totally not a pedophile.
No such thing as peados.... it’s all nonce-sense!
A pedophile is sitting at an empty poker table. An eight-year-old kid asked him if he could sit down. The pedophile says to the child, "Sure, let's play."