Party

Party jokes

Basement

I was having a party in my basement, and my friend asked me what that bag covered in blood was for. I said, "Oh, that's the bag I catch the children with to torture them in this basement."

Alarm Clock

Last night I remember partying with friends to find blood on my nightstand.

Moments after, I scolded my friends to put my alarm clock back where they found it.

Difference

You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?

Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.

Birthday

What is the worst thing about your birthday being on September 11?

Party crashers.

Butt

There was a woman sitting with me.

I had to leave until she pointed at something—it was my butt.

I was confused until it was her turn for truth or dare.

Memes

Cheese grater

Last week was my blind friend's birthday. I thought I would give him something really good that he may need.

As I walk into his house and give him a cheese grater for a birthday present, he sets it next to him. As weeks pass, he comes up to me. He said, "That present that you gave me for my birthday was the most intense book I have ever read!"

Kid

Yesterday I had a party.

I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.

I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!

Beet

What does the beet DJ say when he's partying?

"Dance to the beet, y'all!"

Roast

"Go back to Party City, where you belong!" — Phi Phi O’Hara, RuPaul’s Drag Race.

Dog

My mom told me that my friend Paul is coming over, and he is going to sleep over, so I was happy.

The next day, I ask my mom, "Where's the dog?" My mom asks me, "What dog?"

Then I said to my mom, "I heard Paul say, 'Do you want it doggy?' and you said 'Yeah.'"