At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, “That’s the fourth time you’ve gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn’t it embarrass you?”
“Why should it?” answered her spouse. “I keep telling them it’s for you.”
Yesterday I went to a party at my friend’s house. Everyone was dressed as birthday candles. It was a blowout.
I hate stairs they are always up to something. I love stairs they are always down to party
I had a party the other day. I made sure their were vegan options they make do or fuck off.
How do u throw a space party?
You plan-et hahahaha get it?
AHOY SPONGEBOB! I JUST COMMITED HOMICIDE IN SYRIA, AND THE ONE-PARTY STATE IS AFTER ME FUCKING ASS! ARGAGAGAGAGAGA!
How to astronauts have a party? They planet
Why was the rapper always the life of the party?
Because they knew how to DROP the BEAT
how do you organize a Rave party in Ethiopia? just put some bread on the ceiling
I may not be your cup tea, but I am definitely your 10th shot if tequila
Why did the DJ go to therapy?
Because he had too many issues with his TURNTABLE
Organise my brother's bucks party and got confused when he asked for a hot 22 year old for I brought him 20 two yr Olds....
Good thing my brother's a little bit different.
Guys what should i be for Halloween (aka tmr)?????????
Why do we call it dead bodies? Nobody says alive bodies! like you walk into your workplace, "OMFG ITS FULL OF BODIES! Alive ones tho." You wouldn't give birth and say, "Come on husband, help me with the bodies." If its a surprise party, you wouldn't say, "QUICK, HIDE THE BODIES!" And the person who the party was for wouldn't say "OH MY GOD WHY ARE THEY DEAD!"
Hola! This is when I pranked my mom! I took a fake lobster and put it in the toilet, the fake lobster was in your attic, used for lobster partys but anyway I put the fake lobster in the toilet, so when my mom comes in she will finds it and overreacts to it, Will she did not overreact she FREAKED OUT OVER IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1st she screamed and then she looked and it and she saw it was fake. laterrrrrrr thats the prankster!
i invited my friend with a vasectomy done for a party. unfortunately he couldnt come.
why is there no invitation to an internet party for those with laptops , everyone can get in
A bear and a rabbit are at a bar getting high smoking weed talking about nothing but lies and straight up garbage. and then the bear starts to drink too much damn liquor gets drunk and ask the rabbit can i have one more scotch pretty please? And the rabbit says hell to the naw I'm not about to carry your drunk ass home with me and smell your breath.
Two to the one from the one to the three I like good pussy and i like good trees Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe And i get more ass than a toilet seat Three to the one from the one to the three I met a bad bitch last night in the d Let me tell you how i made her leave with me Conversation and hennessey I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped If i ain't got a weapon i'ma pick up a rock And when i bust yo ass i'ma continue to rock Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet It's real easy just follow the beat Don't let that fine girl pass you by Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind
A drunk walks into a bar and sees a beautiful woman at the other end of the bar and says "Bartender, I want to buy that douche bag a drink". The bartender says "You can't talk like that! This is a respectable establishment, I'm going to throw you out!". The drunk says "Okay, I'm sorry. I'd like to buy the lady a drink". The bartender goes to where the woman is sitting and says "The, ah, gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you a drink, what will it be?". She says "Vinegar and water"
