So, I heard Bounty, the maker of paper towels, has decided to get into the Male Enhancement business…

…their new slogan?

The Quicker Pecker Upper.


The sense or feeling you have dealt with this crap in the past.

There was a boy in the gym who was in his late teens. He was sitting at the dumbells tables but he wasn’t lifting. He instead, sat up and was ripping something up. The manager then walked over to him, and asked “You’re hogging the dumbells, dude! What are you even doing?” The boy hesitated, then said “Getting ripped, wanna join me?” as he held up stacks of blank paper. The man silently sat on the table with him and grabbed some papers. “Why not?” he finally said.

why do u have to wipe yourself with toilet paper because bugs can crawl eat your poop and drink your pee

A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders. As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, “I’ll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, ‘I don’t know how you can make love to me with your type of body.’ So I asked her, ‘How about a little head?’”

Other jokes:

  1. Why did the ketchup blush? He saw the salad dressing.

  2. What did the elephant ask the naked man? How do you breathe out of that thing?

  3. How do you make your husband scream during sex? Call him and let him hear it.

  4. Why does the mermaid wear seashells? She outgrew her b-shells!

  5. How is life like toilet paper? You’re either on a roll or taking shit from someone.

  6. What does one boob say to the other boob? If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts.

  7. What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A man will actually search for a golf ball.

  8. What did Cinderella do when she arrived at the ball? She gagged.

What did the toilet paper say to the other toilet paper? Hey check me out I’m on a roll! 😂😂🤭🤭

Only really smart people will get this with out it being explained

Toilet paper fight hat

I wrote puns on a piece of paper like this:

P. P. P. P U. U. U. U N. N. N. N S. S. S. S

Then I showed them to my teacher, asking him what they had in common “They are all very tearable” he replied Well, there is one person who gets it!

What did the store manager say when they ran out of toilet paper? … We’re wiped out!

What is the difference between a book and a Mexican one has papers

Want to hear a paper joke

Never mind it’s to terrible

Why did the toilet paper cross the road

To get to the Bottom

My sister just sits on the toilet on the iPad then I go to do something at the sink and she says Bella give me toilet paper 🧻 Then I am 😑 annoyed like super

You dropped your toilet paper right and you you want to pick it up but you can’t because you have 💩 poop in your but and it scwoshd😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

While writing my suicide note I got a paper cut…it’s a start

What did the toilet paper say when he got stuck in a crack on the side walk ?I got stuck in a but crack

Hi 👋 I have some good idea 💡 was the best game I had to get in my

Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end the faster it goes and every one is trying to shit on ya.

why did England beat Germany in world war two scissors beats paper

Why does the paper follow up with wine because it was junk do wrong so wrong that you don’t even exist because nobody even eat it ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Haha ha ha Haha ha haha ha ha Ha Hah Hah Hah Ha👺🤮🤢🤢🤢🤔🤭😥🥵🥶😡😤🤬🤬