One Jokes

Two tomatoes are walking on a road. Then a car runs over one of them, and the other says: "Hi, ketchup!"

How can you light up a candle in a ship which does not contain any instrument and you are alone with just a packet of candles?

Answer: Just throw one candle in the sea; the boat will become lighter.

Math riddle: If I have 12 bottles of wine in one hand, and 9 in the other, what do I have?

What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red?

My ex-wife.

No one will fight me, who is brave and strong enough to beat this beta simp femboy?

LIKE IF YOUR NOT BLACK

A man with a beard looks annoyed. The text says, "You go to school, nothing happens. You miss one day. 6 fights, Tupac comes back, school had a blackout & Beyonce performed in the cafeteria."

There were two sisters. They said they were supporting nine eleven, so I shot one of the sister's kneecaps, and the other sister got shot in the head.

Which way do gay men walk?

One Direction.

There was a house with a three-story building.

The first one had Mexicans.

The second one had Africans.

The third one had white people.

An earthquake came.

But who did survive?

The white family because they were at work.

One thing you can ask Mario:

"Can you jump up and down for me?"

What don't Rick Astley and the Twin Towers have in common?

One won't let you down, while the other will.

One rainy day a NASCAR race was going on and they had no other choice but to use this bitch's forehead. https://sportsrecruits.com/athlete/morgan_tomporowski

There were 3 Gay Fish in a Tank. One says to the others: "How do you drive this thing?"

Like this joke if you LOLed! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Are you still a virgin?

If you do IT

With no one?

My great uncle died in a concentration camp.

He fell off one of the guard towers.

Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?

That one friend: 11 - T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.

So an emo shot themselves, and so the detective decides to ask why, but it just goes in one ear and out the other.

I went to the store and I saw no oranges, and I went to ask the cashier:

"Cashier: Which one?"

Thanks for the birthday wishes. It's been an odd one this year, as some of you know, my father suddenly passed away on my birthday last year, and anyone who knew the old man knew he had a sledgehammer wit!

Good on ya dad, ya definitely got the last laugh!