One jokes
There's one shop orphans can't go to, but what is it?
Home Depot.
One day my dog died because we couldn't find him. Then we got a cat on the same day. Then my cat went missing, and when I was crying, we heard our Asian neighbor was having a party. Then we went over and I saw my dog and cat on the grill, and they ate them in front of me, saying "yum yum doggy in my tummy and cat in my tummy as well."
How did Helen Keller drive?
One hand on the wheel, one hand on the road.
I woke up one day to find handcuffs on my bed. Turns out, the girl I drugged yesterday escaped.
* Sans at Sans' favorite restaurant* Sans: Hey, Frisk, what do you eat today?
Frisk: One knife, plz.
Sans: Ok, one knife, plz.
Waiter: You eat a knife?
Frisk: Yes.
*Waiter asking for one knife*
Waiter: Here you go.
Frisk: Thanks you.
Why can't an orphan be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
Why did the orphan cry when he got back home?
Because he did not have one.
Why couldn't the horse give out a speech?
Option one: Horses can't speak at all.
Option two: His voice was a little *hoarse*.
What did one shark say to the other while eating a clownfish?
I was at a funeral. I kissed a hot girl I did not know. She was the one that died.
One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Claus,
"Please send me a sibling!"
Santa Claus wrote him back and said, "Okay, send me your mother!"
What is the difference between an orphan's dad and a boomerang?
Oh... one comes back.
Yo mama so fat that when she landed on the moon, instead of saying "One small step for man kind," she said, "One small step for world domination!"
I rate you 9 out of 10, because I'm the 1 you need.
What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?
With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.
What's the best thing about an abortion joke??
No one gets offended.
Horrible Jokes, Part One- A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing. He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.
My opinion on abortion is very divided. Like, on the one hand, I like the idea of killing babies, but I'm not really into this thing about women being able to make choices.
This man has been through all kinda shit in his life. So one day, he finally looks at himself in the mirror and says, "If another person looks at me again, I'm going to kill myself." He looks at himself and no one ever heard from him again.
Which one would be better to fuck, a fat bitch or a skinny bitch?