Teacher: Alright kids. 50, 49, 48, 47. What comes before 47?
Kid: AK!
Everyone else: πͺ ππΎββοΈππ½ππΏππΎββοΈππ½ππΏππΏππΏββοΈ π ππ»
A white guy was telling his friend about this girl he hooked up with. His friend asks, "Did you get her number?"
He replies, "No, but it's okay, I'll see her at the next family reunion!"
The devil's number is 346 because you will be in jail.
When you step on the weighing scale, it shows your phone number!
How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?
Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.
Why was six afraid of seven?
Because seven is a registered six offender.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
Me, calls the police*
Me: Hey, I'm gonna commit suicide!
Cop on the phone: Please wait till we get there.
Me: Why, so you can then stop me?
Cop on the phone: No, we just want a murder, not a suicidal report on your paper... and we are all bored!
Me: Ok, my house number is *********************, ok!
Cop on the phone: Awesome! Just a sec. *whispers* Guys, I finally found someone who wants to get killed!
So we all know why 6 was afraid of 7, because 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared? It was in between 9/11.
How many Russians does it take to change a light bulb?
I don't know, they just keep Putin them in.
It was pornography class, and there was a break.
Two adults were "having a good time" till the teacher says...
Teacher: Hey! SAY ALL THE NUMBERS TO 10,000 NOW!
Adult 1: How about I say my ABC's?
Teacher: Go ahead, I guess...
Adult 1: A B C E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Teacher: Where's the D?
Adult 2: Inside me...
What's the emergency number, Jimmy?
Jimmy: 9/11!
How many homeless guys does it take to change a lightbulb?
βYouβre telling me thereβs change in a lightbulb?β
Girls are like numbers squared. If they're under 13, just do 'em in your head.
One day, little Sally hears the phone ringing. She picks it up.
"Hello, this is daddy, Sally. Is your mom nearby?"
Sally says, "No, she's upstairs with Uncle John."
"Uncle John? I don't know an Uncle John."
"No, no, no, you must be mistaken, daddy."
"No, I'm sure there's no one named Uncle John in our family."
"Okay, but why did you call?" Says Sally.
"Ummm, no reason, just tell mommy that daddy's pulling into the driveway right now."
"Okay daddy!"
*long pause*
"Okay daddy! I did it!"
"Great job Sally! What did she say?"
"Mommy said OH FU.. and then she ran around with no clothes on and tripped on the carpet and hit her head on the bookshelf. She's now resting it looks like... then Uncle John screams and jumps out the window into the swimming pool, but of course we took all the water out this winter..."
Then dad replies "Swimming pool? We don't have a... is this 468-1843?"
What number is better; 46 or 47?
I don't know, ask the kid with Down syndrome.
An Asian student was learning logarithm in class. He wrote down his name after the question. The teacher asked why. He replied, "My class ID is number 1."
I am in trouble. My mum asked me to get six cans of Sprite.
But I got seven Up.
Learn math the easiest way from Pendu.
Multiplying any number by 0 is 0 itself.
Hint: Multiplying any number by Pendu's G/A in 2022 is 0 itself.
The answer is 0.
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
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