Not jokes
Why did Sarah call off the swing? Because she has no arms.
Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.
Why could the blind man not see?
Answer: Because he is blind.
When Caesar’s wife told him she dreamed he should beware the Ides of March, he scoffed and said, “What? It’s not like I’m gonna be stabbed 23 times by my best buddies!”
God- make a grumpy old man president.
Angel- why?
G- cause I said so-name him Trump.
A- okay.
G- make him not pay taxes.
A- okay...
Fast forward to 2020
G- you know that grumpy old man?
A- yea...
G- make him create a deadly virus named after a beer.
A- Krona.
G- exactly.
A- why do you hate humans so much?
G- because I can.
If I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn because they are Beautiful, Majestic, Sparkly, Bright, Gods. They create Joy and Happiness everywhere they go.
Unicorns made my life better when I got to know them more. ^-^ They filled my life with more Happiness. I believe in the Unicorns, and they'll believe in me. I am not a Unicorn, although I am the Princess of the Unicorn Land, but if I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn! :P
People who wannabe rich and famous rappers should always look at Tekashi 6ix9ine, and learn what not to do.
What does a crooked lawyer who is not on the ACLU payroll have in common with a crooked politician who has an office in Washington, DC?
They both sign their names using a blue pen 🖊 🖊.
I just got my doctor's test results and I'm really upset about it. Turns out, I'm not gonna be a doctor.
We say “Father, I have sinned,” because it would be weird if we said, “Daddy, I have sinned,” right?
“Forgive me, Daddy, for my transgressions!” We say the “Our Father,” not the “Our Daddy.”
Only if Africa have enough mosquito nets, the mosquitos will not die of AIDS.
My hairline may be straight, but I’m not.
9/11 was a round of Clash of Clans. They knocked down two towers, not three.
What if Hitler did not say "bombs away," he said "lambs are slayed?"
What’s worse than getting a job at McDonald’s?
Not getting the job at McDonald’s.
Why did the terrorists crash?
They were doing the job they loved but not getting paid.
Lol.
This black dude goes up to an Indian guy and says, "What up brotha?"
The Indian guy gets offended and says, "We are not the same."
The black guy then pulls out a gun, and the Indian guy says, "Ok brother, ok brother, we are the same, we are the same."
Do the voice in your head.
Lol, this joke may not be funny, but what do you call your mom fat and emo?
Yo mama so fat, when she got on the scale it said, “I need your weight, not your phone number.”
Depression jokes are like food... not every people get it.
These are not funny. Those that are adopted feel hurt by these!
You shall feel ashamed of yourself!
Take the L! - Losers