Not jokes

You failed Helen Keller's speech class? It's okay, she's not a very good speaker.

I went to ask my friend's mom if I could have a sleepover.

Then I remembered they did not have a mom or dad.

Q: What do you call two nuns watching television?

A: Not very interesting.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they do not know where home is.

Hey guys, so we have a friend group and we need followers and people! So far it's me and Royal. If you want to join just comment why and you're in unless people have reasons to not want you!

Roses are red, violets are blue, You make me pee like I drink tea, you make me go buzz, like becoming a fuzz.

It sticks in, but it goes to the bin, after its use, it will be reused, no it is not what your thinking its -~-(clay)-~-

What did the racist Catholic priest say?

"Martin Luther? Not my king!"

Yo mama's teeth so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter!

Have you ever been accused of a crime you didn't commit? Well, I have! I was wrongfully accused of larceny yesterday. I'm not smart enough for that, I just stole some stuff.

Why did the knight cross the road?

He can't because his armor was too heavy.

A fat man was checking his weight and sucking in his fat belly. A physicist saw it and said that's not how the law of conservation of mass works.

Plot twist: The fat man jumped on the physicist and proved him wrong. Now the physicist doesn't have mass.

Why did the sun not go to college? Because it already has a million degrees!

Why does an orphan always get the newest iPhone?

Because so he does not have a home button.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Your mom." "Your mom who?" "It's not your mom, it's my mom!"

Yo mama is so ugly that not even goldfish smile back at her.

Why do the orphans not play baseball?

They can never find home.

Why do your orphans not drink beer?

Because last time they did, he went to suck some dudes' toes, then he tried to take him to his parents, but I guess that never happened.

Orphans are human too! They have parents like all of us, so I don't know why they're saying it's fun to make fun of an orphan. Have you ever been too cold and wondered if your parents are going to have another child and not you? That's not funny! It is %9000,000 NO!!!!!!!!!!

I was stark nude. Hehe, I was. I truly and sincerely was.

The nurses giggled and said, "Joseph, why the hell is your wiener so loving?"

My penis purred and stroked their hands. I laughed and said, "I do not know."

Hey, I just wanna be in bed. I just wanna stay ahead. I just feel like I am dead, And I like that color red. Hey, I am not the big fat loser, And you're just a big accuser, You user and excuser.

Say this to you sister, toxic BF, anyone :)