Not jokes
You know why Elmer Fudd always came out hunting rabbits in the woods? Because Bugs Bunny would not stop flirting with his girlfriend.
The earth is not round.
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Guy #1 is being picked up by Guy #2 from the hospital.
Guy #1: Oh man, I just got my prostate checked. It's not looking good.
Guy #2: Why, what is it?
Guy #1: Turns out, I have prostate cancer.
Guy #2: Oh man that sucks...
Guy #1: Yeah, it's a real pain in the ass!
It's weird how Stephen Hawking's last name sounds like "walking and talking," but he could not do either of those!
What do you call an Indian person who is not starving? Dead.
Memes
My "overweight" friend and I were talking at lunch.
Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly, dude?
Me: *annoyed* Jason, when you stepped on the scale this morning, it asked for your weight, not your phone number.
What's the best part of not wearing a condom when I'm with my girlfriend? My mom went through menopause.
If you have sex and your African parents find out,
“You can do the boom boom. But you can not do the boom boom in my house. Do it somewhere else."
My priest asked if anyone had any questions or anything interesting they wanted to say.
So I raised my hand, he said why don’t you tell everyone what you have to say.
In front of the whole church I said I did not know Jesus Christ was the first scarecrow.
Why do orphans not like jokes?
Because they hate your "mom" and "dad" joke because they miss their parents. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Why don't orphans rob the bank?
Because they're not wanted.
I thank God that I'm not as ugly as you.
You're so ugly not even your mom thinks you're beautiful.
Asian kid: I’m not a doctor, and I’m not good at math.
Me: That’s what I call an orphan!
Can bees fly in the rain?
Not if they don't have their yellow jackets!
Why do emo kids not jump?
They're still in the sky.
It is not funny about kidnapping.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
Do not like, dislike, or comment on this joke.
My wife said she would slam my head into my keyboard if I did not get off video games.
But don't worry I think she was just joking.