Worst Jokes Ever

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

You tell them to clap till their parents come home.

The reason I love Stephen Hawking is because they roll off the tongue so nicely.

Juice WRLD farts smell like McDonalds.

You're adopted, that's why your mom or dad never came back with the milk!

Why do orphans watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas"?

Answer: Oogie Boogie is ugly, so they want to be ugly.

Why do orphans live in an orphanage?

Answer: Because they are wanted there.

"You have to do this," and my sister said, "Well, I don't care."

And I said, "Well, you care enough to respond back, oh my gosh!"

One would think Dracula would have a lot of friends. Unfortunately, no one likes him. He is a pain in the neck.

What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.

One day I threw a boomerang...

Now I live in constant fear.

My life is like a grenade... I pull off the ring and, BOOM, it explodes!

You know what would be the best last thing to say before you die? "No, you certainly can't." JFK's assassin certainly can!

My family is like an apple tree. My sister is that ugly one that has to rot in.

How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?

Change your name to "Rape."

Huh what you say?

Come fight me, suck a dick.

What does my uncle call a school?

A strip club.

I saw a kid crying today. I asked him where his parents were.

I love working at an orphanage.

My name is Myria, my right nut.

So last night I went on a taxi and I showed them your photo. All they said was I could ride him, it would be expensive though, since from his eyebrows to hairline is at least £100.

How does a cannibal like his meat?

Human.