Do you like CDs?
There's this really cool one called "C Deez Nuts."
Worst Jokes Ever
Why can't orphans buy chips?
Because they're family sized!
I was at a farm in France called ‘Uber eats Farmer league’, then I saw a strange creature called ‘Pessi’. He only appears against farmers.
He ran towards to me, I didn’t know what I should do so I decided to shout “Big games! Big games!“ Pessi scurried away.
I was in the Sahara Desert, dying of thirst. Thankfully, Pionel Pessi, the debut man, came to my rescue👨🚒. He brought in 100's of helicopters filled with bottles to quench my thirst. I asked him how he had so many bottles; "big games," he replied. Thanks for saving my life, my idol.
The cycle of Pionel Pessi:
- Ghosting👻
- Diving🐬
- Complaining to teammates😡
- Complaining to refs🤬
- Missing sitters🤦♂️
- Gets a lucky open net tapin⚽️
- Proceed to get 🐐 shouts
- Repeat🔁
People with REAL ball knowledge know he’s just an overrated tapin merchant 😭
MISSING!! MISSING!! 🚨
Name-pionel PESSI Missing: 09/03/2021 vs Madrid Characteristics: Disappearing in big games + Diving + always ranting "give me penalty"
Possible Locations: Penalty Spot, St etienne
Last seen- Alaba’s Pocket
⚠️ ⚠️: don’t walk around with pens
What is the difference between apples and orphans?
The apples get picked.
Yo momma is so stupid, she eats cardboard boxes thinking they're chocolate bars.
Yo momma is so ugly, she gets rejected by dead people.
Yo momma so fat, she farts out volcanoes.
Helen Keller.
I told my husband he should embrace his mistakes.
He hugged me!
Luckily for you, mirrors can't talk, and luckily for you, they can't laugh either.
I meant because.
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
I asked my mom what her biggest regret was for a project at school, and she said, "Oh, go look in the bathroom above the sink..." There was a mirror.
Yo momma's legs are like cottage cheese: white and chunky.
Yo momma's so dirty that when I asked what was for dinner, she sat on the table, opened her legs, and said "Crabs."
If you have anger problems, hit an orphan, because who are they going to tell? Not their parents.
So, a husband and a wife have three kids. The husband is on his death bed, and he looks up at his wife and says, "Honey, is our youngest son truly and honestly mine?" She says in response, "I swear on everything that is good and holy, our youngest son is yours." He dies peacefully.
Then she says under her breath, "I'm glad he didn't ask about the first two."
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They stuck her in a round room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
