My jokes

My friend jokingly confessed to me she did prostitution (consensual).

She wasn't joking. :0

We are 15....

I should probably stop making jokes about 9/11.

My dad died to it, he was a great pilot.

The reason why in the US their emergency number is 911 is because of my uncle Mohamed, RIP, best pilot ever.

I was talking to a Muslim yesterday, and he asked me what it's like to be blind.

I happened to tell him about 20 jokes; in fact, I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with, "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It's not like I need the damn things anyway."

Which way is quicker to die? Noose or slitting my throat?

My penis is so polite. It stands up so girls can sit down.

All my 9/11 jokes crash and burn.

Your hairline be lookin' like my negative bank account balance -1,000,000.

Suck my cheetah.

Dude, people gotta stop letting 9/11 jokes fly around like bro, you're gonna make my brain explode!

My dad was in 9/11, that's rude, and he was a great pilot.

My brother: What are you looking at?

Me: A mistake.

My dog stepped on a bee, My child spilt my tea, I drank my hot tea, I broke my bloody knee, Now I'm lying in agony, And I'm devastated with no glee.

(Again, credits to my really funny friend)

My grandma said, "Hey, you want a Butterfinger cause I do?"

Me: Grandpa's in the kitchen if you want a finger.

Have anyone seen my balls? I can't find them on my chest.

Hey! My balls are on your thing!

My uncle died on 9/11. Her last words were "Allahu Akbar."

My April Fool's joke is going to an orphanage and telling them their parents came back.

Hi, are you even my sister?

Yes, I am.

No, you're not, because you never even existed as my sister.

It's not bad that my car doesn't beep when reversing.

The screams of the passers-by are enough for me!

I killed my cat.