My jokes

My builder was extending my basement when he questioned me because he found three dead kids in a corner tied together.

Yesterday I had a party in my basement.

I got questioned a lot about 5 dead kids in the corner shut in a box. I did that when I was 13, damn I forgot about them!

My brother went missing 5 years ago. He also supported TRUMP. He is currently dead in my basement in a chest in a cupboard.

One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.

I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"

There is someone in my class named Henry Rocket Rueben, and he always says he rockets into my mom.

My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"

My friend has a shovel made of gold. I guess you could call him a gold digger.

Your computer just went in my bathroom and took a shit because you put too much chili in the bowl.

I drove my Chevy to the levy, but the levy was... Oh, CRAP!!!

I've been taking Viagras for sunburn.

It keeps the sheets off my bed at night!

I posted on my Facebook account that you have a picture on Facebook.

Uranus caught a 3-meter flatty while surfing. Check the tail still kicking. Deadly, my bruz!

Hi, this is Chloe, and I am about to tell you about my joke.

Why did the cow cross the road? Because to get to the other side.

Roses are red, violets are blue, My heart is dead, I’m such a fool.

I love my new phone.

I love my family.

What’s the difference between a pile of babies and a Lamborghini?

I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

My sis came up to me and said, "Mom told me to take the trash out for the rest of the year."

"So, uh, you free tomorrow?" 😂

Why do I f*** my mom?

Like father like son. #batabababa