My jokes
Your forehead is so big you can headbutt my face and chest at the same time.
My dad went for the milk, but he left his wheelchair.
My sister 🤣😂
My grief counselor died. He was so good, I don’t even care.
I wonder if Stephen Hawking was an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-kart.
My wife complained about me being childish. So I told her to get out of my fort.
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
Someone locked me out of my house today... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore.
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Orphan: My parents.
My dad died in 9/11, and that was the second worst thing that happened to me with a plane, next to Soul Plane.
My back is straighter than I am, and I literally have scoliosis.
I have a Twin Towers model in my room.
It got infested with jumping spiders.
My favorite dark joke is orphan jokes. For no apparent reason.
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
Leave a like if you LOL at this joke!
Hey girl, are you my boss? 'Cause you just gave me a raise.
Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.
I was given my electronics test today. Turns out it was given to me 'cause I have the same name as someone who got 54/59. I actually got my hopes up, too.
My dad may be working, but the coping mechanisms sure aren't!
The pterodactyl went in my bathroom and peed.
When I was in the shower, I couldn't hear it. Why? Because the "p" is silent.
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."