What do you call Scooby Doo with a blunt in his mouth? Scooby Dooby.
I am not telling you twice, your mouth stinks, so go burn your house down like a crazy mad woman, and I will call the cops like, "WTH," because you are so fat.
Q: What do you call a zombie with no mouth?
A: Useless.
If a simp is staring at you, cover your mouth (they'll stop looking).
Even though I look completely white, I am apparently 70% black!
Until I realized that it was a mouth swab test.
What does a squirrel eat? Deez Nutz in their mouth.
The only thing running in THIS family’s your big ass mouth! Oh, I’d better shut up, or Big Bertha’s gonna confuse my head for a burger!
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
Your mom has quite the mouth on her.
As I found out last night. Oh, what a night!! 😏 😉 😜
My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:
Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*
My brother goes into the bar and says, "Bartender, give me 12 beers and a shot of whiskey." The bartender says, "That's a lot of alcohol." My brother says, "I'm celebrating my first blowjob." The bartender said, "Let me buy you a drink." My brother said, "No, this should be enough to get the taste out of my mouth."
I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?
UGLY!
A man's daughter comes home from school and asks her dad if she can borrow the car.
The father replies, "No, it's too late at night."
The daughter says, "C'mon, Dad. I'll do anything."
The dad says, "OK, suck my dick."
The daughter says, "No, that's disgusting."
The dad says, "You want the car. You said you'll do anything."
The daughter agrees. Just as she is about to put her father's dick into her mouth, she stops and says, "Eww, Dad, your dick smells like shit."
The dad replies, "Yeah, well, your brother borrowed the car about an hour ago."
"My name must taste good; it's always in your mouth."
I’m sorry deez nuts can’t fit in your mouth.
Butt plug, oh butt plug, get out of me.
Butt plug, oh butt plug, get in my mouth, oh how I wanna taste you.
Oh, butt plug, oh butt plug, something is nutty.
Peter: *curses*
Sam: Wow, do you kiss your mom with that mouth?
Peter: Jokes on you, I don't have a mom.
Tony: *having a heart attack* AFSJDHFKJJD Peter, we talked about this!!!
Why does this stingray's wife can't stop babbling?
'Cause she can't watch her mouth.
I wake up in the morning and I suck my teeth.
Little Johnny was not paying attention in class, so the teacher told him, "Do you know what happens when you don't pay attention?"
Little Johnny said, "No, what?"
She answered, "The principal's office."
Then little Johnny said, "Hey teach, do you know what it means when you have balls on your chin?"
The teacher answered, "No, what?"
"You have a d!ck in your mouth!"
