Morbid jokes
Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not Susie.
A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.
What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.
What's pink and rusty? Madeline McCann's bike.
What’s the difference between women and condoms?
There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.
I'll never forget my mother's last words: "What are you doing with that sledgehammer?"
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
Keep the tip.
What's better than 5 babies in one dumpster?
1 baby in 5 dumpsters.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.
What did one casket say to the other casket?
"Is that you coughin'?"
What do you call a Russian rifle that went 1 rank down?
An AK-46.
What's the difference between my basement and my garage?
One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.
I will never forget my Grandpa's last words: "What are you doing with that rope and saw?"
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi?
They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
I remember my grandad's last words: "Are you still holding the ladder?"
Kian. Legit, Kian is a joke.
There was a cannibal who had a wife and eight kids.
My friend told me an emo joke once, and I said, "Emo jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"
I'll never forget my boss's last words: "We shall serve the best meat in our burgers!"
Lol, I switched out my friend's leukemia medication for mercury.
Like and comment if you get it!
Why can't America play chess?
They're missing two towers.