Mom Jokes

Son said to father, "Last night was the best you and Mom..."

Father said, "Yeah, me, you, and your mother had sex."

Son said, "It was fun licking her pussy."

Father said, "I know it was fun when I sucked YOUR dick and your mother did. Did it feel good?"

Son said, "Yes, it was. Wanna do it again tomorrow?"

Father said, "YES BUT without your mom, we'll suck each other's dick and lick it and bite and shove each other's dick next to each other."

Son said, "Yeah, and if we do it again, let's have Mom and my girlfriend join next time."

Father said, "Ok, it's time to go to bed, son."

Son said, "Ok, love you, can you and Mom sleep with me without your clothes?"

Father said, "Ok, but you have to promise to go to bed."

Son said, "Ok, see you there." 💕👅👅👅💦💦💦💦💦💦🙈🙈💦💦💦💦💦

My new stepfather told me that I'm his new son, so I said okay.

My stepfather said that my and your mom have a few things in common. I said, "Yeah, like what?" My stepfather said, "Well, you came out of your mother's pussy; I eat your mother's pussy. You used to suck on your mother's tits; now I suck on your mother's tits. Your mother used to smack you in the ass when you act up; now I smack your mom in the ass now. Your mother calls me daddy; now I am your new daddy."

Why are mountains so cold?? Your mom lol.

Today I explain what things are fake: serial killers, clowns, Billy, fairies, your life, God, Jesus, your mom, and all your crappy fan-fictions about being saved from your even crappier life.

I'm also gonna explain real stuff: YouTube, your dad, scientists, teachers, God, Jesus, and Billy.

Stuff on both is real and fake depending on who you are. Your life IS fake. A lot of idiots will read this.

Kidnapper: Hey kid, your mom told me to follow me.

Orphan: But I don't have a mom!

What did the kid with cancer say? "Can-I see my mom one more time?"

Your mom walked into a bar and broke all the furniture.

Why did the Mexican chicken cross the road?

Because the mom said, "Vente, Baca."

What do you say to someone's mom?

"You mom gay."

Your mom's asshole.

"Your mom gay.exe" has started working.

My mom walks in a bar and the bartender says "water?" saying "we only sell beer!"

Your mom is fat.

Oooo, roasted!

I used to look up to my mom, but now that I am 12, I look down on her.

Your mom should show you your real home. The trash!

If death was an option for a look, you could be the first.

My mom's name is Angel, and she is nothing like one!

Especially in bed...

Ur mom gei.

Guess what? If your mom ever wants to have sex with you, tell her to make another.

I sucked your mom's anus.

There were 5 cows on a farm, one mom and 4 calves.

The first calf goes up to the mom and says, "Momma, why is my name Rose?"

The mother cow replies, "Well sweetie, when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."

The second calf walks up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Lily?", to which the mom replies "Well honey, when you were born, a single lily petal fell on your head."

The third calf walks up, but before it can get a word out, the fourth calf screams at the top of its lungs. The mother cow yells, "Shut up, Cinderblock!"