Antique store jokes

Your momma is so old, when she went to the antique store, they wouldn't let her leave.

Yo mama so old, she walked into an antique store, and they didn't let her leave.

Your mom is so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.

Your mom is so dumb, she called me asking for my phone #.

Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.

Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.

Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"

Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.

Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.

I was walking down the street one day and I passed the gun store. I walked in and everything was half off. I didn't know back to school sales had started already.

Walked in to a gun store, everything was half off.

I didn't know back-to-school shopping started.

You know, eBay sucks. I was looking for a lighter, and it gave me 18,906 matches.

Today, I spotted Johnny Depp on the clearance rack at Kmart. Kmart is currently trying to clear its inventory of wife-beaters.

I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store.

I said to him: "I don't think they have what you're looking for, sir."