Teacher: I used to be an orphan once.
Student: OOFT
Teacher: Who are we missing?
Student: Your parents
I had a huge crush on this girl when I was eight, one recess we met together on the playground and she brought me to the corner of the playground, that was my first kiss and from there it got serious. I told my parents a week later and they freaked out, called the police and they aressted my crush. I miss Mrs. Johnson
Osama's aim was horrible, one of his angry birds missed and hit a field in Pennsylvania.
why do orphans hate dodgeball?
because nobody misses them.
When the school shooter misses you but you gotta play it off;
😐😑
me: brings in missing child police: omg this kid has been missing for 3 months. here is your reward me: oh, cool
NEXT DAY
me: brings in 8 other kids
police :0 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Once I went to watch a match in protugol it was between penaldo and his kids the Refree was Georgiana(his wife) mpaypal and igayspeed were also there the match begin and his kids scored 2 goals in first 10 minutes and during when match was about to end penaldo got angry and asked his wife for penalties his wife declined and he tortured and beat her up and took 10 penalties (missed 7 of them ) but won 3-2. Shame on u penaldo 😡😡😡
horror movies don't scare me. 5 missed calls from my mum scares me.
Man asking waitress, " Pardon me miss may I ask you about the menu please?" Waitress, "It's none of your business about the men I please!"
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Everybody misses Xxxtentacion but the bullet didn't...
Why did the girl rage badly when she got an D- on her essay?
Because the teacher said she missed all her periods
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
WHY CANT MISS PIGGY COUNT TO 70? BECAUSE WHEN SHE GETS TO 69 THERE'S A FROG IN HER THROAT.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Kobe Bryant never missed a shot
But he nailed that mountain
"Have you taken a bath?"
"No. Why, did one go missing?"
I only kidnapped orphans because they have no parents to report them missing.
Jesus and his friend went fishing they both cast the line out and both of them get a bite but Jesus's friend misses and says "damn I missed" jesus said "that's a bad sentence to say if you say it 3 time something bad will happen to you" they cast it out again and both get a bite and Jesus's friend misses again and says "damn I missed" jesus replied "if you say that one more time something bad will happen" they cast out again and Jesus's friends line snaps and he says "damn I missed" jesus said "that's the last time something bad will happen" the biggest thunder storm ever seen appeared and a lightning bolt struck jesus and a voice came from the clouds "damn I missed"
I was playing football with my friends and i got tackled and got a penalty suddenly the ground started shaking and penaldo emerged from the mud and he till the penalty but since it wasn’t andorra he missed. Shame on you penaldo!
