Man asking waitress, " Pardon me miss may I ask you about the menu please?" Waitress, "It's none of your business about the men I please!"
Everybody misses Xxxtentacion but the bullet didn't...
Why did the girl rage badly when she got an D- on her essay?
Because the teacher said she missed all her periods
Kobe Bryant never missed a shot
But he nailed that mountain
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
"Have you taken a bath?"
"No. Why, did one go missing?"
I only kidnapped orphans because they have no parents to report them missing.
It’s ok to yell “Kobe” after missing a shot, he didn’t make it either
I was playing football with my friends and i got tackled and got a penalty suddenly the ground started shaking and penaldo emerged from the mud and he till the penalty but since it wasn’t andorra he missed. Shame on you penaldo!
It’s Christmas morning and all the decorations are done but the tree looks like it’s missing something * grabs the noose *
How do you know a hippie is on her period? Her socks are missing. How do you know she's off? Her socks are tye-dye.
Ex: baby i miss u me: sorry i cant talk im at a funeral Ex: who died?! me: my feelings 4 u bitch
Your mama is so fat that when she wears yellow, kids run after her thinking they missed the school bus
I helped my son (who is missing his arms) unwrap his christmas present ungrateful bastard just sits there and cries, and it's a pair of mittens. the ungrateful bastard is just sitting there, crying.
A wild Iceberg appears. Go titanic! Titanic uses Headbutt The attack misses Titanic Faints
Yo hairline been missing so badly, that the police had to put up a wanted poster for it
Guy: My life is like a game, I should end it.
Guy 2: Is it a hard life?
Guy: Yup
Guy 2: Then you can't kill yourself LOL
Guy 3: Hold on, I know a cheat code to finish the "game"
Once again, RIP Daniel Kyre, he actually died this day five years ago.
He attempted suicide Sep 16, and was in life support, till his parents made the tough decision of taking him off.
We will miss ya bud..... (cyndagoooooooo)
What part is usually missing in an orphan’s computer system?
Motherboard.
Why do orphans miss half their basketball season? Cause' they don't have home games.
There was a solar eclypse at school and we missed it, but it was alright. Your mum went to NASA and recreated it herself.
