Misfortune jokes
What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
Why couldn't the teacher let her kids out?
Because she has no arms to open the door.
What did the blind deaf orphan child get for Christmas?
cancer.
A kid with hallucinations and cancer is on a Jeopardy game show.
"What's behind curtain #1... YOU HAVE WON..... CANCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Why does no one die a virgin? Cause life fucks us all.
My dad is unlucky.
What did the orphan say to the crippled man?
I suffer from crippling depression.
I would roast BlessedBrian, but it seems LIFE already did a thorough job.
You got a black cat.
He was bad luck.
Everyone left you and you committed suicide.
What a CATastrophe!
Once an orphan got a girlfriend. He regretted it. She left him too.
Remember kids, when you're angry, burn down an orphanage. Then they'll really be living the hard knock life.
Orphans are depressed, hahaha.
You're an orphan and blind. You have cancer. You will die in 3 days. Merry Xmas!
Why did the blind man fall into the well?
He couldn’t see that well.
Two lepers playing cards... one threw his hand in; the other laughed his head off.
Why did the orphan try to get hurt?
Because then they would get surrounded with people who care about him.
He looks around, no one is there.
What is worse than 16 babies in 16 dumpsters? One baby in 16 dumpsters.
My happiest moment in life was getting a positive grade on my H.I.V. test without studying.
Three Europeans come to America. They all get captured by Native Americans, who want to kill them. However, the Europeans beg to have their lives spared. The Native Americans agree not to kill them on one condition: the Europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit, and they will be informed what to do with it.
The first guy comes back with a peach. The Native American says, "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass, laughs, and the Native Americans kill him. The second guy comes back with a grape. The Native American tells him the same thing. He laughs, and the Native American kills him.
They both see each other in heaven, and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach and peaches are fuzzy, so that's why I laughed. But you had a grape, what happened?" The second guy says, "Oh yeah, I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!"
Are you depressed? Go punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?