Mirror jokes
A mirror and a beer bottle are arguing.
The beer bottle says: "If you break me, you get one year of bad luck."
The mirror scoffs: "Oh, that's nothing. You break me and you get 7 years of bad luck."
The condom overhears these arguments and walks off laughing.
Me: Hey, say I am ugly for a billion pounds.
Them: You're ugly.
Me: Sorry, I am not a mirror.
If you want a joke, look at yourself in the mirror!
So, my mom looked in the mirror today, and we need a new one.
How do you know your acne is getting out of hand? The blind start reading your face.
1+1 answer 2 said all the kids, but 1 kid said 5. Then I said your mom feels embarrassed because everyday you look into the mirror, you see how empty your brain is.
My girlfriend is so fat, she looked into the mirror and said, "Woah, there are two of me!"
You wanna see a joke? Look in a mirror.
Ever tried looking in a mirror lately? I wouldn't, your crooked hairline might break it.
You want to know what the ugly truth looks like? Go look in the mirror.
If you guys wanted to see a joke, just look in the mirror.
One time you walked up to a mirror, but it’s shattered because of your reflection.
Knock, knock? Who's there? A mirror, I'm lonely.
Enemy: You know, I saw you walking down the street, and at first glance, I thought you were a fat and ugly bitch.
Me: Strange... Who puts a mirror in the middle of the street?
The mirror says: "If you break me, you will have 3 years of bad luck."
The Magic Jewel says: "If you break me, you will have 10 years of bad luck."
The condom just sitting there laughing.
What do you call a dad in the mirror?
(Your imagination.)
What do you call an orphan in a room full of mirrors?
Surrounded by loved ones.
Friend, you're bold and fat.
Me: Bro, go to the bathroom and look at the mirror. You will probably break it.
Me: You stupid. Guy: You straight. Me: Sorry, I'm not a mirror.
Today when I looked in the mirror, I stopped and simply said: "It's ok, what's inside matters the most, right?"