Midget jokes
What is the difference between a dwarf and a midget?
Very little.
Why do you call a fat midget?
Jiggly Puff.
Do midgets still start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"?
Sophia matched with a midget on Tinder.
Midget: Hey! What’s up?
Sophia: Well technically everything is, from your perspective!
How do you piss off a midget?
Give them a yo-yo and tell them to play with it.
Why don’t midgets wear tampons?
Because they’ll trip over the string.
The optimistic midget's coffin was half full.
What do you call angry midgets?
Short-tempered.
I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and I thought, huh, that's a little con-descending.
Why does everyone respect midgets and dwarves?
They never look down on anyone.
Why shouldn’t you pick on a midget with learning difficulties?
... Because it’s not big and it’s not clever.
You can easily outrun a midget because they have to run twice as much as you do.
If a midget with down syndrome shows up late for work, is it okay to say she's a little tardy?
Why did the midget not go to bed?
He couldn't reach the bed.
If there was a quiz on midgets, here’s the Midget quiz and the questions that would be on it:
1. When midgets get high on any drug, do they get high or medium?
2. Do midgets come out the closet or the cabinet?
3. Are Midgets related to Snow White’s 7 Dwarfs?
4. Is a midget just a human without the mushroom in Mario?
5. Was this funny?
Friend says, "You were so drunk last night, you threw a mushroom at a midget and said, 'Grow, Mario, grow.'"
What do you call a dwarf police officer?
A guinea pig.
When a midget smokes weed, do they get high or medium?
Did you hear about the lesbian midget? She probably came out of the cabinet.
When a midget smokes weed, does it get medium?