Midget jokes
I could never date a midget.
We would never see eye to eye.
What’s a kind midget’s favorite type of joke? Short and sweet.
How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three, because it’s the normal person's height.
I saw my midget neighbor at a bus stop.
"Jump in, I'll give you a lift home," I said.
"Bugger off!" he shouted back.
"What an ungrateful little man," I thought as I zipped up my backpack and continued my walk.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
Everyone is autistic midgets.
What’s the best thing about midgets??
They don’t need to bend while giving blowjobs.
When is the best time to punch a midget in the face?
When he’s standing next to your girlfriend and says your hair smells nice.
What phone do midgets use?
A MICROphone.
What do you call the midget sea?
A pond.
What is the one spray that can kill midgets? Bug spray.
Why do midgets work at Tesco?
Because every little helps.
If a midget says your hair smells nice, is that sexual assault?
A midget walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says no.
The midget asks why. The bartender says, "You're a little drunk!"
Why do midgets giggle when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
If a midget does meth, does he get high or get medium?
"Dababy midget porn."
What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?
A small medium at large!
"Black midget porn is in 911."
Once there was a midget man jumping on a pothole saying 43, 43, 43. A kid walks up to the man and says, "Why are you saying 43, 43, 43?"
The man stops and looks at him, then he starts jumping again and says 43, 43, 43.
The kid asked him again and so on.
Then the man stops, opens the pothole, throws the kid in, closes it, and starts jumping and says 44, 44, 44!!!"