Man jokes
One day a couple was walking when the man stepped on something hard and squishy, then they heard a sound from the bushes. Instead of looking down, they both ran.
Two years later, they turned on the TV to find Ted Bundy on trial. They asked him if he has ever been caught. He said, "No, but a couple was walking as soon as I killed a girl. I jumped into a bush. They didn't know I was there, but the man stepped on the dead body but didn't look down, then he and his girlfriend ran."
Dad: How was your trip to the park?
Daughter: It was good until the man came along.
Dad: *gasps* Whatever happened, it wasn't your fault, but tell Daddy, what happened?
Daughter: He made my friends go away so it was just me and him... then he took my dress off...
Dad: Oh God, what next?
Daughter: Nothing, that was it.
Dad: Oh, come on! That wasn't exciting, make something up!
What is the most sensitive part of a man's anatomy while he's masturbating?
His ears.
Why do Indian men marry fat women?
Because they worship cows.
What do you say to a crippled man getting bullied?
"Why not you stand up for yourself?"
Women be like men should pay for first dates, then get mad when you do...
What do you call it when a man gets high in Panera Bread?
Panera sped.
Man, I love telling jokes about orphans. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
If I teach man he is the fish I caught, will I no longer be a fisher of men?
Why did the transgender man only eat salad?
Because he was a "her" before.
Man with cancer: How much time do I have left?
Doctor: Ten.
Man: Weeks? Months? Days?
Doctor: Nine, eight, seven...
Three gay men enter a bar in Iran. They don't come out.
What's the difference between a gay man and a hairline?
The hairline is way straighter.
Give a man a plane ticket, and he’ll fly for a day.
Push a man from a plane, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life.
What does a man have 3 of, which a girl only has 2 of?
Legs.
Hitler was the most handsome man alive.
Everyone died for him.
What did one God say to the other?
"I will die to be a man."
What does a blind man and your dick have in common?
They both can’t get up without a dog.
Transgenders! Men in disguise!
My brother when he sees a girl.