Man jokes

When I went to the basketball pitch, I saw a man dribbling his own balls.

What does a man have 3 of, which a girl only has 2 of?

Legs.

Hitler was the most handsome man alive.

Everyone died for him.

What's the difference between a gay man and a hairline?

The hairline is way straighter.

Give a man a plane ticket, and he’ll fly for a day.

Push a man from a plane, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life.

What do you call it when a man gets high in Panera Bread?

Panera sped.

Man, I love telling jokes about orphans. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

What did one God say to the other?

"I will die to be a man."

If I teach man he is the fish I caught, will I no longer be a fisher of men?

Man with cancer: How much time do I have left?

Doctor: Ten.

Man: Weeks? Months? Days?

Doctor: Nine, eight, seven...

What did the doctor say to the Chinese man?

"Some ting wong."

What do you call the Gray Man in an electric chair? Fried Fish.

So I went to Comic-Con and saw a man with an arm missing, and I thought, "Cool display," until I heard him screaming and getting the other arm chopped off. Then I said, "Man, now that's a 10/10 display, wow!"

A man and a boy were walking through a dark forest. The boy said, “I’m scared.” The man said, “Why are you scared? I’m the one who’s going to leave these woods alone.”

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Mail man.

Mailman who?

Bitch, do you want your mail?

What can you tell [as] a difference between [a] man and a woman [in a] relationship?

Both of them are just full of shit.

Man: Stop with these orphan jokes!

Me: Why? Are they going to tell their parents on me?

What do you say to a crippled man getting bullied?

"Why not you stand up for yourself?"

Men play video games to let their inner child out, while women do abortions.

Man: Doctor, where are you taking me?

Doctor: To the morgue.

Man: But I’m not dead yet.

Doctor: Are we there yet?