Man jokes
Guy: Say "I'm a man" every time I stop.
Person:
Guy: You walk into a bar.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You meet a girl.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You and the girl go to a hotel.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You guys go on a bed.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: She whispers into your ear...
Person: I'm a man!
Why do women always have sex with the lights off?
Because they never like to see a man having a good time.
What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 1800s?
Master.
What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 2000s?
Coach.
Straight men change their girlfriends like they change their undies. So, about once a month.
I feel sad because I went to an old man in a wheelchair while he was sitting next to a fire, and I screamed, "Hot Wheels!" 🤣
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
What do you call Miles Morales Spider-Man from Europe?
Kilometers Morales.
What did the Twin Towers get when they ordered an extra large pepperoni pizza?
When the pizza man got there, all they got was plane.
Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?
Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.
Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.
Father: Now you know.
Danny Devito looks like one of those men with a short, yet thick penis.
How did the man with a small penis become a rapist? His condom fell off.
The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!
How did the Scottish man find the sheep in the tall grass?
Satisfying.
A gay guy asked me for directions, so I told him to go straight.
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by an orphanage but then realize there's no speed bumps here...
A man finds his son climbing the roof of his house. The kid kept using all sorts of material to climb up, but the dad didn't pay much attention.
Next day the kid went to the state tower and kept climbing using some adhesive gloves. The dad asks his son for a second time: "Son! Why are you doing this?" The son replies: "You told me to aim up high!"
What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
There was a blind man in WWE, and the commentator said, "Watch out! Watch... Oh, he can’t see." After he was sued for national offense.
Why do men have penises?
They gotta shut women up somehow.
John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.
"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"