Man jokes

What does the word circumcise mean?

Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.

A panic-stricken man explained to his doctor, “You have to help me, I think I’m shrinking.”

“Now settle down,” the doctor calmly told him. “You'll just have to learn to be a little patient.”

What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife?

"I woke up Chris Breezy."

Q: How many men does it take to open up a beer?

A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it in.

What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?

Driving under the influencer.

Why do gay men hate periods? Because they per Collins.

I went fishing with my grandpa, and my fishing line caught the attention of a school of fish. I told him to get my gun.

A black man said, "Where are the young ones?"

Why are black men's eyes always red after sex?

From the mace.

How do you know Adam and Eve were White?

Have you ever tried taking a rib from a Black man?

A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news for you. You really have to stop masturbating."

The man looks aghast and says, "Oh my God, doc, why?!"

The doctor replies, "I'm trying to examine you."

My last best man's speech was like the marriage--short, occasionally funny, and ultimately ruined by the bridesmaid.

An orphan comes up to me and says, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."

Why is an orphan's favorite movie Spider-Man: No Way Home?

What's the difference between a crumbled man and 9/11... nothing, they're both crumbled.

If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.

South Tower: Man, that was da bomb.

North Tower: No, that was da plane.

I came across a pic of the oldest man on earth on IG. He was 132 years old.

I commented "age is just a number" for him; now I'm banned.

A man tried to tame a horse, but always failed. The news spread around town that this man couldn’t tame one single horse.

One day, the man went to a bar, where a fairly old man sat next to him. “Well partner!” He began. “I guess your dream horse is more of a NIGHT-MARE!”

The dear God created the man.

Then he created woman.

When he then saw what he had done, he took care of tobacco and alcohol.

Teddy’s got a man in his Fanny.