Man

Man jokes

A man was having a dream. He dreamt about a mystical creature that was commonly known as the god of toast.

When the man woke up, he turned to tell his wife about the dream. When he delivers the "toast god" punchline, his wife shrugged as she faced the opposite direction to the man.

The man turned around also and started sobbing as he realised his marriage is in shambles.

What do you call a woman who thinks she can do anything a man can do? Wrong.

A very rich and famous comedian walked into a Russian bar and asked for a vodka, but the bar man (a big fan of his) answered to him: - "This vodka isn't good enough for you." - "If it is good enough for you it is good enough for me!"

A man comes home and finds his wife in bed with another guy. "What's going on here!?" he exclaims.

The wife replies, "See, I told you he was stupid."

Old man goes to the doctor.

The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."

The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"

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  • There was a man in a wheelchair, and he got knocked out in front of a bus. He had a wheelie good life!

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  • A man with no arms is tasked with a lot of jobs. Then he says to his boss, "I can't handle all of this!"

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  • Yo momma so stupid... weather man says it's chilly outside... instead of a jacket, she gets a bowl and spoon!

    A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, "Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs!" And the doctor replied, "I know. I amputated your arms."

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  • A man and a giraffe walk into a bar. The man orders a beer, one for him and one for the giraffe.

    After they finish their drinks, the giraffe falls over, and the man gets his stuff and heads for the door.

    The bartender says, "Stop! You can't leave that thing lying on the floor!"

    The man says, "Mate, that's not a lion, it's a giraffe."

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