Mama jokes

Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"

Yo mama is such a slut, she could get slapped by a pack of hot dogs and get pregnant.

Yo mama so fat that if she didn't eat for a day, there would be enough food to feed Africans for 500 years.

Yo mama so clueless, she dialed 911 on the microwave.

Yo mama so fat, she has to bathe in the Pacific Ocean.

Yo mama's so dumb, her dad said, "You're driving me crazy," and she said, "I didn't know crazy was a place!"

Teacher: “Alright, we’re going to play Kahoot! Please use your real name.”

That one kid putting Joe: -_-

Teacher: Who’s Joe?

The whole class: JOE MAMA!

Yo mama so fat that when she pooped, poop exploded everywhere!

Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, the earth falls out of the Solar System.

Yo mama so fat, it took your dad eight years to come back with the milk.

Yo mama's so old, when she was a girl, rainbows were black and white.

Yo mama's ass is mad crusty!

What color flowers do mama cats like to get?

Purrrrrrrple flowers.

Yo Mama so fat, she could fit you in her stomach.

Little Johnny was in kindergarten, and his teacher said, "Okay, everyone, tomorrow you must come to school and recite the first three letters of the alphabet." Johnny didn't know the alphabet, so he decided to ask his family. He walked into the kitchen to find his mom on the phone. He says, "Mama, what's the first letter of the alphabet?" His mom doesn't notice him standing there and says, "If you don't shut the fuck up right now-" So he goes to find his brother watching TV, and he says, "Tommy, what's the second letter of the alphabet?" His brother doesn't notice him and says, "I'm Batman." So he went to his grandma who was knitting and says, "Grandma, what's the third letter of the alphabet?" The grandma then realizes she left her biscuits in the oven for too long and says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!" Satisfied with the answers given to him, he thinks it over and goes to school the next morning. When his teacher comes to Johnny, she says, "Johnny, what are the first three letters of the alphabet?" "If you don't shut the fuck up right now," Johnny says. "Who do you think you are, young man, to talk to someone like me that way?" the teacher asks. "I'm Batman," Johnny says. The teacher whups his ass, and little Johnny says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!"

Later that day, he understands what happened and can't tell which was worse, that he accidentally cussed at his teacher or that his family was ignoring him.

Your mama is so ugly even the trolls threw up.

Yo mama so fat, when she decides to workout, the stock market goes bankrupt.

Yo mama so fat, even Bob the Builder said, "We can't fix that!"

What is dumb, yo mama, you dumb stupid idiot?

Yo mama so fat when she walked all we knew was EARTHQUAKE!