Make jokes

I was making a coffee for my boss and this was the supposed recipe:

1 egg 1 tomato diced bell peppers a bag of sugar sea salt coffee beans rusted nails.

I got fired and spent the next 20 years in prison with a dude named Papa Bear.

Your hairline goes so far back, your mom is scared you're not going to make friends.

Ever wondered how Jesus got rid of the cross that killed him?

Burned it in a hellish fire to make some firewood.

I just overheard this but:

How do you make a party in space?

You planet.

You're so ugly, when you put makeup on, it makes you look like a clown.

I can make a living with the "Treat Yo self" budget.

Yet I can’t use the "Help yo self" budget.

One time, I was making a caramel apple.

When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!

Are you a razor? 'Cause you make me red.

When God make white people he said, "FUCK I'M OUT OF PAINT!"

You're so bent and ugly that you'd make Elton John go straight!

Never give up, 'cause never gonna give you up.

Never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna desert you.

What sound does an Indian make when you're trying to fuck it? ieieieie.

Are you a hotdog stand? 'Cause you make my hotdog stand ;)

If I make a great joke, I will pay for it.

What does a kid do when he's bored and he's sitting? He puts wheels on the chair and makes it a wheelchair.

How do you make an orphan shut up?

You tell his mom.

How can you make an Otter Pop become funny?

Take your shotgun and make an otter go "pop!"

I will make more jokes tomorrow.

Do you think I can shoot a basketball?

I make it dip like water.

Suck on a finger, once bite it off, taste it, put some ketchup on it, wait, I'm making a mess, I bit it off!