They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.
Make Jokes
I guess making 9/11 jokes at the airport is better than shouting "He's got a gun!" at the airport.
Did you make your bed this morning? Wanna unmake it together?
How do you make a snooker table laugh? Tickle its balls!
I'd make a 9/11 joke, but they always crash and burn.
I really used to be into emo chicks. Now they just don't make the cut.
They're making a new Alien movie.
There are so many aliens you can't keep track.
Whenever I work late at the hospital, I help the patients sleep.
There isn't a snooze button on the beeping things, and it can be quite annoying, making it hard for the patients to sleep, so I unplug them.
What’s 9 inches long and makes my girlfriend scream?
One inch and put it in her. Her miscarriage.
Your mom is so ugly that she uses Snapchat filters to make her pretty.
What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent?
"Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!"
Are you a razor? 'Cause you make me red.
What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?
She charges you for extra sauce!
Scientists make skyscrapers and airplanes.
Religion crashes them.
What's the difference between a cop and bacon?
Bacon is full of fat and makes you feel good. A cop is full of shit and will make you feel their hot steamy cock as they ram it up your ass with some justice sprinkled on top.
Google is a woman because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence before it makes suggestions.
A guy on a bus saw a beautiful girl. He asked for her number, and of course, she said no. He asked the bus driver for advice, and he said, "That girl goes to the cemetery to pray every day at 10 p.m. and look for a statue of an angel." So he dresses up as God, goes to the grave, and she sees him. She says, "Oh, Lord, end my misery! Kill me now!" And he said, "Only if you do something for me first." She replied, "What is it, oh mighty Lord?" He said, "Have sex with me." She agreed. They had sex, and when she was done sucking his dick, he said, "I have something to tell you." He took off his costume and said, "I'm the guy from the bus." And she took off her costume: "I'm the bus driver."
(Does anyone remember this? It's an old joke someone made, or does no one remember this? I didn't make this, but it went smth like this)
What’s the best thing about making out with dead girls?
They can’t say no.
Your ma is so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.
How do rappers make their money?
By dropping dimes.
