Love jokes

Why do orphans love McDonald's?

Because the initials are like "mother" and "father."

I remember having a crush on my math teacher, so I winked at her and said, "Don't worry, babe, I'll call you later."

Why did tube date electricity? Because he would light up when she touched him.

I love teaching students

how to make them harm themselves.

A man and a woman get married. The woman was a retired hooker. The man was a poet.

The man said as they did 69, "You taste better than my most delicious gourmet meal." The woman said, "Well, you aren’t too bad either, but the best 69 I’ve gotten and given was Harry. He did it for 24 hours nonstop." They got divorced that night.

I said I was going to my flat. I really meant your girl.

"I work with animals," the guy says to his Tinder date.

"That's so sweet," she replies. "I like a man who loves animals. Where do you work?"

"I'm a butcher," he says.

Are you a gun because I want to live with you?

I fucking love rhubarbs.

Why do orphans love school so much?

They have no HOMEWORK.

Why can't an orphan be in a relationship?

They have no one to call "daddy."

Guess the joke.

Your girlfriend.

My favorite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.

Girl: Dad, where are you?

Dad: I went to go get milk.

Girl: But we have milk.

Dad: I know, I just don't love you.

Two emos are dating, and the most romantic thing they have ever done is slit each other's wrists.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Ukraine will go puff.

Why do orphans love Oreos?

Because when they have a family pack, they can eat it all!

I love you all the way to Uranus! 🤣

What do trans women bring to lesbian relationships?

Something big and warm 🍆.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll be the dolphin, you can be the jellyfish.