Lost jokes
What's one thing you'll never find in lost and found?
Your dad.
What did Eminem call himself when he lost weight?
Slim Shady.
The Libertarian Party was founded in 1971, and the Libertarian Party has lost every presidential election since 1972, and according to the Libertarian Party the Libertarian Party is the only political party in the United States that is the party of principle. If the Libertarian Party is the party of principle then why hasn't the Libertarian Party won a presidential election since 1972?
Because it is politically motivated.
Why did the rapper get lost in the music?
Because he couldn't find the beat.
The twin towers were just tryna take after the leaning tower of Pisa, but they lost their balance and fucked it up.
What do an orphan's father and Nemo have in common?
They are both nowhere to be found.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost a water gun fight.
Today was no fun. A rhino escaped from the zoo and ate two parents, and I lost my job as zookeeper.
The orphan was playing baseball. He hit a home run. His coach told him to run home. He couldn't find it.
Where do you go if you lost a pencil?
Office Works! They have solved loads of pencil cases.
Why doesn't the U.S. Government play Clash of Clans?
Because they lost two towers already.
Why does my cheating ex-wife wear a colostomy bag?
She lost her ass playing poker...
Why do Republican men hate transgender people?
Because they lost a dick-measuring contest to a ladyboy in Thailand!
Nothing is lost until Mom can't find it.
Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home? He lost the whey!😅
I tried phone sex once, lost my bits to a stray "call waiting" beep. Very painful. Never again.
The other day I lost all my crayons.
I just wish I had a shoulder to cray on.
A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."
The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
Yoo! I found a $100 bill, found a child who said they lost their $100 bill. Gave them $25.
When God gives you glory, you give it back.
I lost all faith in humanity. I am moving to Uranus; it's really big. I might get lost.