Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
Because he lost his filling.
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor?"
You are my compass; without you, I’m lost.
"Our all-transgender brigade has suffered heavy casualties!"
"What? We haven’t even sent them to fight!"
"They’ve already lost 30% of the unit!"
Well, good for you, I guess you moved on really easily. You found a new girl and it only took a couple weeks. Remember when you said that you wanted to give me the world? (Ah-ah-ah-ah) And good for you, I guess that you've been workin' on yourself. I guess that therapist I found for you, she really helped. Now you can be a better man for your brand new girl. Well, good for you, you look happy and healthy, not me. If you ever cared to ask. Good for you, you're doin' great out there without me, baby. God, I wish that I could do that. I've lost my mind, I've spent the night Cryin' on the floor of my bathroom. But you're so unaffected, I really don't get it. But I guess good for you.
Well, good for you, I guess you're gettin' everything you want (ah). You bought a new car and your career's really takin' off (ah). It's like we never even happened. Baby, what the fuck is up with that? (Ha) And good for you, it's like you never even met me. Remember when you swore to God I was the only Person who ever got you? Well, screw that and screw you. You will never have to hurt the way you know that I do. Well, good for you, you look happy and healthy, not me. If you ever cared to ask. Good for you, you're doin' great out there without me, baby. God, I wish that I could do that. I've lost my mind, I've spent the night Cryin' on the floor of my bathroom. But you're so unaffected, I really don't get it. But I guess good for you.
Ah-ah-ah-ah Ah-ah-ah-ah Maybe I'm too emotional But your apathy's like a wound in salt Maybe I'm too emotional Or maybe you never cared at all Maybe I'm too emotional Your apathy is like a wound in salt Maybe I'm too emotional Or maybe you never cared at all Well, good for you, you look happy and healthy, not me. If you ever cared to ask. Good for you, you're doin' great out there without me, baby. Like a damn sociopath. I've lost my mind, I've spent the night Cryin' on the floor of my bathroom. But you're so unaffected, I really don't get it. But I guess good for you.
Well, good for you, I guess you moved on really easily.
"Welcome to mama mia's pizzeria and abortion clinic, where last weeks lost is this weeks sauce."
Yesterday we lost a quarter of our roof in the storm, oof.
When the quiet kid lost a game of basketball and reaches into his bag,
other people in the gym: "Oh shit this nigga bout to shoot."
I don't like it when people make jokes about 9/11, because we lost 19 great patriots that day.
Roses are red, my blood is too. I see a lot when I lost you.
Why do US suck at chess? We lost both our towers.
Why is England so good at chess? They still have their queen.
Why does Russia suck at chess? They only have pawns.
My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12.
Welcome to Antonio’s pizza and abortion, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce!
I lost my virginity once and found it in a store being sold off.
I was remembering the time when I lost my brother, only until I heard that hide and seek wasn't the best idea, especially in a secluded parking lot in downtown.
What does an orphan and a lost kid have in common?
They have no way home.
What do you call a AK-47 that lost 1 point?
An AK-46.
My girlfriend and I played Russian Roulette once.
We had sex afterwards even though she lost.
Stephen hawking lost connection to the WiFi
A woman buys a house, but she doesn't know what to name the house, so she stuck her head outside and heard "Hairy butt," so she named the house Hairy Butt.
The next month she had a baby, but she didn't know what to name him, so she stuck her head outside and heard "Crack," so she named the baby Crack.
After a year or two she lost him, so she called the police and said, "Help! I looked all over my hairy butt, but I couldn't find my little crack."
