Location Jokes

What is the slipperiest county?

Greece!

I still don't know what's the worst, most dangerous place to take your children on holiday, but, for certain, it's either Vatican City or Neverland Ranch.

I am on the German website.

A Scouser at ground zero just after the twin towers fell asks a passer-by, "What time is it, mate?"

An American replies, "That's a mad accent, where are you from?"

The Scouser says, "Liverpool."

The American says, "Oh, what state is that in?"

The Scouser looks around and says, "About the same state as this, mate, but what time is it?"

I made Google Earth for orphan kids.

Sadly, it does not show where home is.

Why can't an orphan live peacefully?

Technoblade: As a ghost, he could locate all orphans within 2 weeks.

I saw a kid crying, so I asked them, "Where are your parents?" Then she cried harder, so I left the orphanage.

Child: Hello, I can’t find my dad.

Stranger: Oh, well when and where did you last see him?

Child: Oh, I remember, 5 years ago he went to get some milk here.

Yo mama is like train tracks; she gets laid all around the country.

A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.

The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"

How did the Scottish man find the sheep in the tall grass?

Satisfying.

So a girl says to her ex, "I can't get you out of my mind, the boyfriend I knew." The girl replies, "I see you in everything, like when I'm walking down the street, even at work, like trash cans are everywhere."

Did you know that, statistically, 1 in 10 people live next door to a pedophile? Not me though, not me though; I live next door to a lil 10 year old boy with a FAT ASS yenno what I'm sayin'???

Little boy asked his dad why he was born black.

Father replied, "So the heat from the sun doesn't burn your skin."

Then he asks, "Why is our hair all frizzy like fuse wire?"

"So the coconuts when falling from the trees won't hurt you."

"Then what are we doing living in Rochdale? (England)"

What do you call Miles Morales Spider-Man from Europe?

Kilometers Morales.

When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."

Where did Stephen Hawking go after he died?

FNAF Sister Location.

What did the mother say to Michael J. on the beach?

"Excuse me sir, but you're in my son!"

Foreplay in may areas: "You awake?"

Way down South: "You awake, mom?"

Where did Amy go after the explosion?

Everywhere.