Did you know that, statistically, 1 in 10 people live next door to a pedophile? Not me though, not me though; I live next door to a lil 10 year old boy with a FAT ASS yenno what I'm sayin'???
Where did Stephen Hawking go after he died?
FNAF Sister Location.
When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."
What do you call Miles Morales Spider-Man from Europe?
Kilometers Morales.
Foreplay in may areas: "You awake?"
Way down South: "You awake, mom?"
Where did Amy go after the explosion?
Everywhere.
One day I met a blind guy and I said, "You should see Mt. Cheaha!"
What do Madeline McCann and a submarine have in common?
Both are at the bottom of the ocean full of seamen!
What is the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson?
The location of the Dirtbag.
Kid: Where do I put this paper?
Teacher: I already said go ask your neighbors.
Kid: Ok. *Walks home to his neighbor's house*
Kid: Hey neighbor, I didn't know where to put this paper, and my teacher said to ask you. Do you know?
Neighbor: No, sorry, I don't.
Kid: Okay, bye! *Kid walks back to school.*
Kid: Teacher, my next-door neighbor didn't know.
Teacher: Ugh, you went home?!
Kid: Yes, you told me to!
Teacher: I meant at school!
Kid: Ohhhhhh!
Teacher: Duh!
When my dad once went to the Virgin Islands, now it's just called the Islands.
Do you know the murderer, The murderer, the murderer, Do you know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
Yes, I know the murderer, The muffin man, the murderer, Yes, I know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
One time a man climbed a mountain and saw a guy.
"Who are you?"
"I am mountain man!"
What did the mother say to Michael J. on the beach?
"Excuse me sir, but you're in my son!"
A kid went to visit his bully, and he says, "How's your face?" The kid says, "How's your parents?" and proceeds to walk out of the orphanage.
Me at an orphanage: I need to talk.
Orphan: My parents!
Me: You know that word?
Worst jokes ever? More like I killed an old man in 2012 in Oklahoma City at that nasty Red Lobster, not the one near the freeway, and hid the body in a creek!
MISSING MISSING!!! 😢😢
NAME: PRUNO PENANDES 👍🤝
MISSING: 27/6/21 VS BELGIUM 🤔🤔
LAST SEEN: DIVING AT OLD TRAFFORD, CRYING TO REFEREES🤬😿
POSSIBLE LOCATIONS: PENALTY SPOT🥅
"GIVE ME PENALTY”🤬🤬
"I ONLY STATPAD AGAINST FARMERS MY FRIEND"😁😁
Where are virgins usually born?
Virginia.
What mountain do people like to race on?
Mount Rushmore.
Get it?
