If life was like Pacific Rim, I'd say your mom's pussy was a category 5.
There was a dude. He had a mondo dong.
His wife was like, "Yo, where are your balls?"
The dude says he left them in the fridge. His wife replies, "I knew those meatballs tasted weird!"
A man and a woman are watching clouds together. The man says, “Hey, that one looks like a giraffe!” The woman agrees and says, “That one looks like an elephant!” The man sits up and says, “That one looks like a mushroom.”
Would you like a piece of Africa?
Would you like to know why? Because it's a dessert/desert.
Why do cannibals not like to eat clowns?
Cause they taste funny!
Why can’t orphans have a horse?
Because they run away like their mum did.
How do you get a squirrel to like you? Act like a nut!
Why does Donald Trump smell like dog shit? Cuz he's a dawg!
Why is Ronan's forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead. It also had rings.
Why is Jupiter's ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan's forehead kept it stuck in orbit.
Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy.
JFK and Abraham Lincoln were terrible presidents. It's like their heads were empty.
Why don’t eagles 🦅 like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it!
yo forehead so big u look like aeri
What would the world be like without women? A pain in the ass.
I like penis in my bum!!!
Like if you are emo
Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes, and everyone is trying to shit on ya.
The waiter asked me, "How would you like your steak?"
I replied, "As soon as possible!"
Hey Explain bear, how would you like to be replaced by #ExplainNibbles the hamster AI?
A boi found a magic vase and a genie came out and told him he had one wish. The boy said, "I wanna be like Batman." The genie said, "OK, your wish is granted."
The boy came home later that day and his parents were dead.
Roses are red, I like burgers on a bun.
This news: family neuters furry son.
