Like jokes
Me: Do you like smash?
Friend: Smash Rolls?
Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!
Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:
Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"
Dads are like boomerangs, I hope.
Putin be like CSGO is much harder in real life!
Son: Dad, I'm gay.
Dad: I support you.
Son: I like you.
Dad: Get out and into my room!
Memes
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
Yo mama so fat she makes the sun look like a dwarf star!
Boy: Hello, Mom, can I have $50?
Mom: Does it look like I am made of money?
Boy: That's what M.O.M. means, right?
"Jordan, motherfucker, your face looks like a slut, and your life is trash. Stop picking on kids and LEAVE THEM HELL ALONE!"
Why is Ronnie Anne like Lincoln? Because he is a softy about everything.
What's the difference between you and Frankenstein?
He is not ugly like you; plus, he has a wife.
How do lions 🦁 like their steak?
"Roar!"
All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.
The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"
The man said, "My wife does!"
I read a quote about the Twin Towers that hit me like a plane.
Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.
Titanic is like our president; it cracks in half and dies.
Hey, what’s your favorite type of tomato? Mine is sun-dried tomato.
Get it? "Sun-dried" like "son died."
Bully says, "You are DISGUSTING!!!!!!"
The girl says, "Just like your face."
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
They are like pepperoni and cheese as a plane.
A priest walks outside and finds two young boys sitting on a big ice cube. The priest asks what they are doing. The boys answer that the priest always likes a couple of cold ones before he goes on.