"Jordan, motherfucker, your face looks like a slut, and your life is trash. Stop picking on kids and LEAVE THEM HELL ALONE!"
Like Jokes
Why is Ronnie Anne like Lincoln? Because he is a softy about everything.
You look like a sandwich Bigfoot didn't even like.
What's something an orphan likes but doesn't have?
A family.
What did Nemo's dad say? "Man, he's a lot like my dad, I can never find him!"
You know orphans are kinda like a house with no people in it.
Because it’s empty inside.
I like sucking the Twin Towers off, but then I forgot dad already finished the job.
What's a ghost's favorite food?
I like some boo-ritos!
What looks like half a cat?
The other half.
Quote of the day:
A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.
Chao!!!
Like my daddy? Too bad you don't have one.
Like Markgeraldnasol and his Pokemon Jokes.
What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
The Blonde got a Ph.D.?
Yeah, like that would ever happen.
My dad told me a new version of a happy birthday song:
Happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo, you look like a monkey, and you smell like one too!
No offense to anyone reading this on their birthday.
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
I would rather do my own laundry, not my uncle's laundry, because I ain't no damn butler like Alfred from Batman. I don't live in no damn Batcave by Gotham tity.
What is red and shaped like a bucket?
A red bucket.
My pathological cheater of a sister wanted to play a board game with me.
I turned her down because I didn't like the Risk involved.
What do you call a group of letters that like to dance but make you want to poop?
A vowel movement.
