I've been drinking from a tall cup.
His teeth look like Twin Towers, Al-Qaeda blown him up.
Fruit punch sounds like the name of a gay boxer.
Dark jokes are like gay people, Not everyone likes them.
She's a 10, but she doesn't like sex.
Y'all smell like ass! XDXDXDXDXD
Guy, it was so weird yesterday. I saw a guy, and he kept repeating the same thing over and over. I hate people with dementia. I told my mom to get a new mirror, but she won’t listen to me. It’s almost like I said it like 20 times every time I say it.
You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.
I don't know what to write here, just like...
Your hairline is so big it looks like the TITANIC.
like if your short
l like ur mom naked
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
That chromosome gon' leave just like your hairline. 😗😮😮
I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!
I forgot you can't make depression jokes outside of Twitter, lmao. My coworker was like, "You ready for this year to be over?"
I was like, "I'm ready for this life to be over." He was like, "Bro, what?"
Therapist: And what is it about this generation that bothers you?
Satan: I give them the intro tour and they just say shit like "ooo spooky lol."
Therapist: That's not so bad.
Satan: When I showed one girl the pit of everlasting flame, she sighed and said "big mood."
I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t feel like screaming.
What does a disabled disco play?
"When your legs don’t work like they used to before."
God = what I hope to be.
Devil = what I can't accept.
I hope to be like Jesus, a dead martyr. I can't accept that my religion is evil.
Depressed procrastinators feel like they wanna kill themselves sometime soon.
