Like jokes
What is your body like? Soft.
High school is amazing. Like if you agree!
The bible says to love your neighbors as you love yourself.
So I treat everyone like garbage.
Q: Why couldn't the queer wist eating his hot dog?
A: Because it tasted like shit.
Why does Hitler drink milk? Because he doesn't like juice.
Hey, What do you want? We broke up like 5 days ago, leave me alone. Ok, first wanna do some things? What kind of things? Illegal things. Like what? Knock you off and hide your body. 🤡🤡🗡
I don't get why people don't like my abortion jokes. Do they have a stick up their ass? Wait, that's the other hole.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Fortnite is dead, so are you.
(I have no friends because all of my friends play Fortgay, just like my friends all of them are gay.)
I like my Oreos how I like my victims... Drowning.
They say I’m sliced like the apples in a kids meal.
Q: What kind of Christmas music do elves like?
A: “Wrap” music.
"I like planes."
- Plane Guy
Why doesn't Helen Keller's boyfriend like having sex with her?
'Cause she just lies there like she's dead.
Why can't all guys be more like Kenny? He doesn't get all upset when his mom isn't in the mood.
I heard oxygen and magnesium were dating, and I was like, "OMg!"
Being gay sounds like a pain in the ass.
The Cheerio Joke
Let's say you're in high school, and your popularity level was based on what Cheerio you are. So there's Extra-Frosty Cheerios as the most popular kids, the frosted Cheerios were the popular kids, the Regular Cheerios as the typical normal kid, then there's the honey nut Cheerios as the nerds and geeks, and then there's your Cheerio which is the Chocolate Cheerios. Now you want to ask this girl who's an extra frosty, you go up to her and ask her to Homecoming, but she declines.
So after school gets out, you go home and rewind. The next day you wake up feeling like a honey nut Cheerio, so you go up to her again and ask her again, she still says no. So you go home and rewind again and wake up the next morning feeling like a Regular Cheerio. So you go to school and ask her again, she still declines. So you go home and rewind again. The next morning, you wake up feeling like a frosty Cheerio. So you go up to her and ask again, still says no. Then you go home and unwind. The next day you wake up feeling like an extra frosty Cheerio. Feeling doubtful, you go up to her one last time and ask her. She finally says yes.
The next day is Homecoming, and you and your date are on the dance floor, and she wants punch. So she tells you that she's going to go get punch. She goes and gets punch and is back in 30 seconds. You ask her why it was so fast. She replies with; "Oh there wasn't a punch line."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Stop acting like an owl!
What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus?
One is hairy and smells like fish, and the other is a walrus. You're welcome.
I am like currency; people always trade me out for someone better.