Life jokes
Life is like a raisin cookie you expected to be chocolate.
Disappointing.
Why is it so easy to roast an orphan?
What are they gonna do, run home and tell their parents?
Cancer kids be like: "When I grow up... lol nevermind."
This joke never gets old. Just like the child.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because he doesn't have parents.
Man dies.
Who does an orphan play soccer with?
No one.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
The moment when you're too depressed to fantasize about death--it's so tiring.
Why do your orphans not drink beer?
Because last time they did, he went to suck some dudes' toes, then he tried to take him to his parents, but I guess that never happened.
Why did the mailman die?
Because everyone dies.
Friend: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Friend: Your life.
Me: Ahhh, I wish!
*jumps off building*
I took a sip of water.
I tried to calculate 3/(my life), and I kept getting zero.
MAGAnon STOP SCAMING FOR THE SAKE OF LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A B C D E F G.
Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!
If you don't like my spelling, Explain Bear, have you realized I'm a duck and you are a bear? I've got more internet power and meme power, so shut the duck up and get a life and stay off my property and the internet.
So, I was walking down the path of my life with Bigfoot, noticing the two pairs of footprints, mine and his.
One day, I notice his prints are gone. I look up to him and say, "You had promised you would always be there for me. How is this possible?"
He then looks me straight in the eyes and says, "Raw!"
The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.
He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!
Life.
Here's a joke: Your life.