Lesbian jokes
What do you call two lesbians in a closet? A liqueur cabinet.
Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?
He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.
What do you call a tent for lesbians?
Finger Hut.
Do you know the number one cause of death for lesbians?
Getting your fingers stuck in there.
If a man and a woman need a marriage license to get married, does a lesbian couple need a liquor license to get married?
If a man and a woman need a marriage license to get married, does a lesbian couple need a liquor license to get married?
What do lesbians do while having their period?
They finger paint.
What do you call two female lovers spying on the government?
Lesbionage.
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?
Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.
What do you call lesbian sex during their period?
A blood transfusion.
A new drug has been developed for lesbians with depression.
It’s called Trycoxagain.
Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?
Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.
What’s another term for a lesbian?
A vagetarian.
What do you call an LGBTQ+ plane?
A biplane.
How do you make a lesbian upset?
Give her a multiplication test.
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
Neither one of them, they eat out.
My lesbian neighbors and my sister gave me a Rolex for my birthday. I guess they misunderstood when I said I wanted a watch.
What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.
My lesbian neighbors gave me a Rolex. Guess they misunderstood when I said I wanted to watch.
A lesbian couple and a gay couple are going to San Francisco. Who made it first?
The lesbian couple got there lickety-split.
The gay couple was still packing their shit.