Queer jokes

How to treat someone who’s lesbian, gay, queer, transgender or bisexual?

The same way that you would treat anybody else, you homophobic bastard.

What’s the name of the band in the gay bar?

A: Beers for Queers.

What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love?

“The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”

What do you call an LGBTQ+ plane?

A biplane.

Roses are red, Your mum's a queer, Fucking hell, Can’t get out of first gear!

What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.

What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?

Fruit Loops.

How do you break up a fight between two gay men?

Say, "Can you get straight to the point?"

Q: Why did the Queer get fired from the sperm bank?

A: He got caught drinking on the job.

What do queer guys call hemorrhoids? Speed bumps!

I support LGBTQ.

Let's Go Bully The Queers.

Yo momma so queer that she thinks Paige Stawicki will be the first female in the NHL.

Q: Why couldn't the queer wist eating his hot dog?

A: Because it tasted like shit.

Suck my butts, queer.

"(live comedy club) Foul Mouthed Trump Hating Comic:

......"Hey how 'bout that Donald Trump chump, what the fuck up with that dude, man? Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!" (< leap week, muthafukas!) . . . "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit that's synonymous for being fucked up, for instance"....

STUMP: TEENY DICK

BUMP: TINY TIT

GUMP: DIMWITTED MOVIE IDIOT GUY

MUMP: A FUCKED UP CHILDREN'S DISEASE

LUMP: IF IT'S MALIGNANT, YOU'RE KINDA FUCKED

UMP: OFTEN MAKES TERRIBLE CALLS

RUMP: AN ASS

DUMP: A PILE OF SHIT THAT CAME OUT OF AN ASS

HUMP: SOMETHING DADDY DID TO HIM DAILY THROUGHOUT CHILDHOOD

PUMP: SEE "HUMP" . . . and last, but definitely not least --

JUMP: JUMP INTO A DEEP HOLE MOTHER FUCKER, AND GO TO HELL!!

.... "Well that's about it for me as my explosive diarrhea is about ready to take a turn for the worse!! ......(splort!, plop!)....... OOOOPS!! ..... sniff, sniff........ Ewww!" (audience roars) "Fuhhhhk!". . . I better go, 'cause I just went!! ..... Ha! ha! ha!" . . . "Thank You Lazies and Gerbilmen! Good Night!!" ............

(endless laughter, guffaws, cheers, jeers, queers, beers, pants pee-ing, beaters beating, pepper sprayin', guns poppin')

"OH LORDY!!... HELL HATH FINALLY COMETH, AND ARMAGETTIN' THE FUCK OUTTA HEEE!!"

(quick curtain call, and off to waiting taxi.........with the windows down) .......Amen."

Being gay sounds like a pain in the ass.

Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense. Baby, we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing.

Yeah, I’m LGBTQ.

LETS GO BULLY THE QUEERS!

What is gay - curious 🤔 😳

👬 👬 a gay man that is curious about experiencing sex with a 👨 👩 👨 bisexual man.

👨 👨 👩 🚲 🚲 🚲 does it cycle now?

🚲 🚲 🚲

😢 😔 sorry for your luck 🍯 honey it sucks 😪 😞 😒 to be you.

Isn't it strange that the LGBTQ flag only has straight lines?