Lesbian jokes
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
None, they both eat out.
Heh, what do you call two girls who love scissors?
Lesbians! Bahahah!
If you read this, you are gay/lesbian.
What do you call a masculine lesbian who smokes weed?
A stoned butch.
Q: What do you call a hot lesbian who smokes weed?
A: A high femme.
What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.
What do you call ten lesbians in a room together? Fingerhut.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet together? A liquor cabinet.
What do you call a room full of 50 lesbians and fifty congressmen? 100 people who don't do dick.
Why don't women wear miniskirts in the winter? 'Cause they would get chapped lips.
What do a cliff jumper and a gay man have in common? If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit.
Why is it called scissoring and not lip-syncing?
What do you call a lesbian vampire?
Cunt Dracula.
Oh, you need a lesbian joke?
Uhh... gimme a second....
Me???
I have a crush on a girl and both her parents are millionaires.
I guess that gives the term "Eat the rich" a whole new meaning.
I told my lesbian friends, "I wanna watch," so they bought me a Timex®.
It takes a licking and keeps on ticking.
What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers? Well hung.
Why do lesbians have the highest rate of domestic violence?
Because women are emotional and full of drama.
What do you call an Irish lesbian?
A Gaelic.
What do you call a lesbian pirate?
Red Beard.
What do black lesbians say about pussy?
"Smells like chicken, tastes like chicken."
Why can't lesbians wear makeup while on a diet?
Because they can't eat Jenny Craig while Mary Kay is sitting on their face.
Why do lesbians go to Sports Authority?
Because they don't like Dick's!
What do you call a closet with two lesbians inside?
A liquor cabinet.
My lesbian friends bought me a gold timepiece for my birthday.
But, I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch!"