Lesbian jokes
What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic? Snap-on tools.
Man: Can you be my girlfriend?
Woman: I'm lesbian, sorry.
Man: Oh, here's your rope.
What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe?
Fur Traders.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.
1st daughter: Dad, I'm lesbian!
Dad: Oh, OK!
2nd daughter: I'm also lesbian.
Dad: WTF, does any 1 in this family love dicks?!?
Son: I do...
My wife and I’s gay marriage counselor advised us to watch porn together. So, we decided to try it out one day and search up lesbian shemale porn.
And that’s the day she found out she was a porn star.
What do trans women bring to lesbian relationships?
Something big and warm 🍆.
I got breast implants for my wife to squeeze on as she thrusts on my meat while straddled in between my legs.
Did you hear about the exciting new drug they developed for lesbians with depression? They call it: TRICOXAGIN.
Why do I tell bad jokes?
I'm a lesbian.
What do you call a lesbian on a bike?
A dyke...
What do you call lesbians having sex?
My cheating dyke ex-wife!
Can two high-femme lesbians go on a date with each other?
Yes, but it will take them forever to get ready.
What does a lesbian bring on the second date?
A U-Haul.
What do you call an Indian lesbian?
Mingeeta.
One day I caught my sister talking to my girlfriend, and she said, "You never told me you're lesbian." I said, "No, not at all." My girlfriend asked, "Why did you not tell her?" and I said, "Because every time I bring a girl home, I hear too much noise in her room, and I never get the chance to kiss them because she's cleaning the trash." She said, "Yeah, the trash is her junk."
Gay orphans don't exist cuz they have no one to call "daddy," and lesbian orphans don't exist cuz they have no one to call "mommy."
What do lesbians cook for dinner?
They don't, they just eat out.
What does a lesbian call the other during sex?
Mummy.
Lesbian stands for:
L: Loving
E: Extra
S: Shitty
B: Bitches
I: I
A: Am attracted to
N: Nice girls.